Saturday, January 26, 2013

Game of Rogues

This Batman / Game of Thrones mash-up is currently available from the fine folks over at Nowhere Bad. Get one before it's gone!

Friday, January 25, 2013

Friday Night Drive-In

I realize lately I've been pounding you all over the head with almost nothing but Judge Dredd related things. You'd think I would be ready to stop by now. NOPE. One last Dredd related post this week, as the Sylvester Stallone flick is playing at the Drive-In!

Court's adjourned.

Wednesday, January 23, 2013


Absolutely in love with this shirt available today only from RIPT apparel. Get one of this slasher/Animaniacs mash-up before it's gone forever at midnight.

Tuesday, January 22, 2013

Infinite Playlist - Don't Ask, Don't Tell

Current most played album in the Batcave is "Evolve" from Chelsea Grin. It's only 6 songs, but every single one of them kills. This entry into the Infinite Playlist is my fave on the album, Don't Ask, Don't Tell. Enjoy!

Saturday, January 19, 2013

Dredd-ful Movie Night

My current obsession with all things Judge Dredd is going to come full circle tonight, as I'll be watching both Dredd movies back to back!

I know most long-time Judge Dredd fans absolutely hated this Stallone flick, but being that I wasn't really familiar with the character (aside from his first two encounters with Batman in comics) when it came out, I freakin loved it. If only Sly had kept the damn helmet on, I think fans would've gone a little easier on it. Truth be told, it's probably been close to 10 years since I've seen it too, so I'm pretty psyched for tonight's viewing.

I've literally watched this movie five times since the bluray was released back on the 8th of this month. I can't even begin to describe how disappointed I am in myself for not getting to a theater to watch it when it was out. I am 100% in love with this movie. It's The Raid, only with Judge Dredd instead of a SWAT cop. What's not to love?! Big action, lots of blood, and I wouldn't have thought it, but Karl Urban is actually a pretty badass Judge Dredd. Throw in Lena Headey as the villain, and you have yourself a recipe for one hell of an action flick. Drokk yeah!!!

Saturday, January 12, 2013

Been a while since we talked comics, eh? Let's talk comics then. Truth be told, lately I've been cutting back a little, dropped most of the Marvel NOW shit that I was reading, aside from Deadpool. Thing is, while I was at least interested in them enough to give them a shot, what I'm not willing to do is buy the fuckers at an almost weekly rate. I have no clue what Marvel is thinking, aside from doing their best to run print comics into the ground and have everyone switch over to strictly digital, but almost every NOW book I signed up for ended up shipping two or three times a month, at $3.99 an issue. For something I love, I might do that, for books that I'm only mildly interested in? Not so much.

Another title I signed up for, I ended up dropping before the first issue even shipped. If you've got your finger anywhere near the pulse of the world of comic bookery you can probably guess which book that was. In case anyone has been living under a rock, and has somehow avoided spoilers to this point, I guess I should post a SPOILER WARNING for the goings on of Spider-man right now...

So, Marvel just recently ended Amazing Spider-man (again) with issue #700. I haven't been a regular Spidey reader for years, even though I love the character. I just haven't been digging what the creative teams have been doing on the book. But with a new first issue, and a new series entitled Superior Spider-man, I figured why not give it a shot. Then I read issue #700 of ASM, and I found out exactly why NOT to give it a shot. Writer Dan Slott has somehow managed to make the Clone Saga look like a work of Shakespeare, by  having a dying Doctor Octopus manage to do a mind-swap with Spidey, and yep, you guessed it, Peter Parker died in Otto's decaying body. Now Doctor Octopus is Spider-man. Only things didn't go exactly as planned or something, and he's gained every one of Peter's memories and experiences, which has lead him away from a life of crime and turn him into a somewhat honorable superhero. Oh, and Peter's psyche is also still in there too somehow, so even though Otto has the lion's share of the brain, Peter's always gonna be there to make sure he doesn't stray from the path of the good guy.

I've read some bad Spider-man runs in my day, I mean some BAD Spider-man runs, but there's absolutely no way, no matter how much I love the character, that I can support a book like this. I know my single vote doesn't mean much, and Spidey fans are as bad as we Batman fans are when it comes to buying the character through thick and thin, but if Marvel thinks this is the kind of Spider-man book that fans want, they're fucking nuts. Don't know why it's so difficult to find somebody to write good Spidey stories, but until someone other than Dan Slott is given a chance, consider my Spider-boycott to continue.

Now, on to something more positive! Although I'm a huge Star Wars fanboy, I've never been one to read the books or comics, the movies, video games, and animated series' have always been enough for me. I might pick up the occasional mini-series based on a character that I dig, like Boba Fett or Maul, but have never really done the ongoings. That has recently changed though, courtesy of a brand new series from Dark Horse from writer Brian Wood. The best thing about the book is that you don't have to read 4 other ongoings to keep up with everything. It's simply titled "Star Wars" and is set directly after the destruction of the first Death Star in Episode IV. If I'm going to read Star Wars stories, this is the time frame in which I'm interested in reading. I don't care much for characters I'm not already familiar with. Give me the classics any day. My interest isn't solely Wars related though, my main excitement for the book comes from writer Brian Wood. His name might not be one that people think of immediately when it comes to comic book writers, but just as with most creators who work for Dark Horse Comics, he's more about quality than rock star status. He also tends to focus on one or two things at a time, and not constantly jump from one book to another for an arc or two *cough*Marvelwriters*cough*.  As of right now, he's currently working on this one obviously, but also The Massive which I mentioned in an older Fresh Ink post. I'm also looking forward to checking out Mara from Image, the first issue is out but I haven't gotten around to reading yet.

Friday, January 11, 2013

Friday Night Drive-In

A lycanthropic romp is on tap for tonight kids! This is the flick that introduced me to Neil Marshall, and I will be eternally grateful for it. For some reason, making a decent werewolf movie seems to be quite difficult. I can only think of a few that I truly love. Dog Soldiers most certainly earns it's spot on that list...

"If Little Red Riding Hood shows up with a bazooka and a bad attitude, I expect you to chin the bitch."

Monday, January 7, 2013


Didn't take NowhereBad long to print a design I simply can't live without in 2013. Get "Battoo" before it's gone forever, three days from now.

Saturday, January 5, 2013

Texas Chainsaw 3D

Since this one's still brand new, and many people who are planning to watch it haven't had the chance to do so yet, I feel obligated to include a MAJOR SPOILER WARNING on this little write up. The short, spoiler free version of what I'm going to ramble on about below is this:

The good: the first 10 minutes, The bad: The rest of the movie.

Read further at your own risk...

So, as with any new entry into a beloved horror franchise, I entered the theater Thursday night with a sliver of hope, but not really expecting anything other than getting disappointed. For whatever reason, and honestly your guess is as good as mine, I actually had a pretty good feeling about TC3D. I guess it was all the advertising, the art had that old, gritty look to it, and the trailers didn't look all that bad either. Well friends, let me tell you, I walked out of the theater proclaiming TC3D as my first real disappointment of 2013. As a matter of fact, not only was I disappointed, I kinda hated it. If you read this blog a lot, you'll know that I'm pretty forgiving normally, and can find at least something to like in most things, no matter how bad they are. Well not this time.

Being that this is generally where I do the synopsis, I'm stating ONE more time, I'm posting huge SPOILERS here. The film begins just minutes after Sally Hardesty escapes the Hewitt's in Tobe Hooper's 1974 Texas Chainsaw Massacre, apparently she's gone to the Sheriff, and I don't know if she didn't give him a ton of details, or if he's just under the impression that he's Shaft (one bad mother), but dude rides straight up to the Hewitt house all by his lonesome. After a shouting match between himself and the Hewitt's (mostly Bill Moseley!), he's soon joined by a lynch mob of rednecks looking to exact their own form of justice. The rednecks firebomb the house, and open fire, basically killing everyone inside. Two of the Hewitt's manage to escape with their infant daughter, but their caught outside and killed, and the baby is taken. Fast forward to today (?) and although it's been almost 40 years, the baby has only made it to somewhere around her early 20's?! She's also a goth-ish chick, who slices meat in the local supermarket, and makes weird art from animal bones (groan, and DOUBLE GROAN). She receives a letter informing her that a distant relative has died, and left her a house in Texas. Road trip!

So she, her boyfriend (Trey Songz, groan), and two other friends from the supermarket all load up in a van and head toward Texas. Along the way, they pick up one other traveler, a hitchhiker (staple of the TCM franchise and all that). From here, the film is fairly close to the formula, they arrive at the house, eventually discover that Leatherface is in the basement, chainsawery ensues. Fast forward a bit, and Heather (goth girl) manages to escape and get back into town. Here's where things really pissed me off. Turns out the town is comprised mostly of grown up versions of the rednecks who made up the lynch mob that torched the Hewitt's, and they're none too happy that the "one that got away" is back in town. When she goes to the police for help, one thing leads to another, and Heather ends up on the run from them too. She's finally captured, and taken to a slaughter house on the outskirts of town. Leatherface has also made his way, albeit slooooowly, to said slaughter house. What happens next is hands down the most ridiculously stupid thing in Texas Chainsaw history. I don't remember if it's ever addressed either way, but Heather has a mark on her chest which is either a brand, or a birthmark, which labels her as a Hewitt. When Leatherface notices it, he recognizes her as family, and ends up helping her against the redneck cops. Yes, friends, Leatherface becomes a good guy. What. the. FUCK. Of course the two of them triumph over the rednecks, return to the house, and it seems as though Heather has officially accepted her role as a member of a clan of murderous, psychotic cannibals and decides to live in the house with Leatherface, her chainsaw wielding maniac of a cousin. Whom, until he tried to murder her just hours earlier that night, she had never even met before. Roll credits.

People, I'm willing to let a lot of things go when it comes to character developments in movies. I'm not one of those people who is unable to suspend belief and just go with things. But come ON. This is a character who, aside from a white trash upbringing and a strange desire to make art from animal bones, appears to be at least fairly normal. Then a maniac wearing a mask made of human flesh chainsaws most of her friends to death, then some redneck cops try to kill her, then she finds out she's related to chainsaw maniac, who then helps her against the rednecks, and her first thought isn't "I'm getting the MOTHERFUCK OUT OF HERE.", it's "This is home now, I must live here and cook PEOPLE for my chainsaw wielding maniac of a cousin to eat." Give me a fucking break. It took no fewer than THREE people to write this shit?

Texas Chainsaw 3D managed in it's first 10 minutes to take away exactly what makes TCM films so great, the FAMILY. Sure, he's the "face" of the franchise, but it's most certainly not all about Leatherface. Take the remake and prequel for instance, say what you will about Andrew Bryniarski, but in my opinion R. Lee Ermey is way fucking scarier as Sheriff Hoyt. I love Leatherface of course, but I love the fact that his family is even fucking crazier than he is. The other thing that bugged me about it was that the cannibalism aspect is implied and hinted at, but they never really come out and say it. Leather chainsaws a couple of people, and while there are plenty of bones strewn about, we never get that scene with everybody at the table that I always love so much in a TCM movie. Being that Leatherface most likely can't cook, I guess he just hasn't eaten in the time between Grandma's death and Heather and co.'s arrival?

There was no way this movie was going to please everybody. But my God, it almost seems as if they were not only not trying to please fans, but intentionally piss them off. Everything about this movie felt wrong to me. The performances were bad, Dan Yeager is unintimidating and unimpressive in every way as Leatherface, and as with most "made for 3d" flicks, the cgi was pretty awful in 2d. If I absolutely had to say something positive, I suppose the first few minutes of the movie were pretty good, but that was just a recap of what happened in Hooper's classic TCM 74. Oh, and there was one kill, not by Leatherface, which made me laugh. Everything else sucked ass though. I haven't been this disappointed by a movie I decided to see in a theater since the Nightmare on Elm Street remake, and say what you will about that one, but at least they didn't make the parents who torched him the bad guys and Freddy a hero. Fuck Texas Chainsaw 3D.

Side note! The whole night wasn't a wash. The theater I saw this piece of shit in was one of my favorite spots in Atlanta, The Plaza. They're not known for showing first runs of major releases like this, they tend to show more obscure things. For example, I saw Hobo With a Shotgun and Troll Hunter there, but the theater recently came under new ownership, and the guy is really pushing for The Plaza to be Atlanta's home for horror. I also got to meet Nathan from Son of Celluloid! He was there celebrating the second birthday of his badass blog. Super cool cat, it was great meeting and chatting with him. I urge anyone who isn't to go and check out his site.

Wednesday, January 2, 2013

Killer Joe

Being totally honest, I watched this one based entirely on the cast. Being even more totally honest, while there are lots of people in this one that I like, my main draw to Killer Joe was Matthew McConaughey. Say what you will about Mr. McConaughey, but I love the dude. There are few people making movies today with the ability and range to play as many different type of roles that he does. In Killer Joe, as of right now, I have to say he's probably at his absolute best. He's that good  in it.

Killer Joe is one of those train wreck type of movies, where something happens to somebody who isn't particularly intelligent to begin with, who then gets into trouble and proceeds to do even more unintelligent things that ends up getting him into even more trouble. Case in point, Chris, a young man who is the product of a Texas white trash trailer park upbringing who has amassed quite a bit of gambling debt and doesn't have the money to pay up. Seeing no other options, he hires "Killer" Joe Cooper, to murder his mother so that he can collect the insurance money. Of course things go as far from "as planned" as they could, and Chris and his family end up not only in trouble with the local loan shark, but also a contract killer who has performed a service which they can't afford to pay him for.

This movie is pretty fucking twisted. I had no idea just how twisted it was going to get. All I knew was it has the Con-man, Emile Hirsch, Thomas Haden Church, and Gina Gershon, and if that doesn't flip your switch immediately then you've been watching the wrong movies. But damn, there is some pretty brutal stuff in Killer Joe, some of which is a bit difficult to watch. As mentioned, the cast is fantastic, and everybody 100% brings their A-game. I imagine when a group of talented people get to work together like this, it's incentive for them to be at their best. This is definitely the case here. If you've never been around a trailer park family, trust me when I tell you, the Smith's (Emile Hirsch, Thomas Haden Church, Gina Gershon, and Juno Temple) are frighteningly on point.

If the last half hour of this movie doesn't leave you sitting there with your mouth hanging open with a "what the FUCK?" look on your face, then go ahead and assume that you terrify me.

Tuesday, January 1, 2013